Hearts at Home 2014

I knew Hearts at Home would be tricky timing for me this year with it being so close to my due date.  It was scheduled right between the dates that I would have had Hannah and Jacob, but I took the risk and signed up, knowing that it wouldn't look like a "normal" year at Hearts.  Luckily, my hospital stay was the week before Hearts and not the week of or I probably would not have made it!  My friend Sandy offered to drive us both there and back, and we decided not to spend the night this time.  I think that was the right call because I got to bed early.  I'm not sleeping well these days, so I was glad to be at my own home. 

Hearts is always a good day of encouragement for me as a wife and mom, although I will admit I was a little tired this year!  A highlight was definitely getting to see good friends.  Five of my closest girlfriends from college were there; we all got to have lunch together.  And, I had workshops with several of them!  I also got to spend lots of time with Sandy in the car and going out for breakfast and getting dinner to take home to our families.  That all made the day worth it for me!  

I also got to attend some good workshops:

My first workshop was with Crystal Paine of moneysavingmom.com, who I read almost every day and I really admire.  She encouraged the moms to stay plugged in:

1. God and His Word (Get up before your kids, pray for your day, read Scripture, write some blessings from the day before)
2. Your Marriage (Thank your husband for his efforts, write him love notes, remember his love language, flirt with him every day, etc.)
3. Refreshment (Take a day off every week, no to-do list and no electronics, spend 5 minutes a day doing something you love)
4. Friendships (Invest 5 minutes a day into friendship)

The next speaker I heard was Angela Thomas, who spoke about what kids need from their mom.  She pinpointed that:

1. Mom's attitude sets the tone for the house
2. We need to raise our kids in the presence of God
3. God calls us to be boundary makers (and not to be mean, but to be fun!)
4. Kids need to see us spending time with God
5. We should never stop touching our kids

Next was Debbie Cherry on Intentional Parenting.  She encouraged us to:

1. To put our relationship with our kids before rules
2. To discipline with an established relationship, otherwise it will only lead to temporary obedience
3. Set aside time to do some formal teaching
4. Watch for opportunities to teach "life lessons"
5. Decide in advance how I want to teach and train my child
6. Choose in advance how to respond to misbehavior

And NEVER:

1. Give idle threats
2. Nag
3. Fail to follow through or follow-up
4. Be inconsistent

A parents power tools are Positive & Negative Attention and Ignoring:

1. Whatever behavior you give attention to will be reinforced and repeated, whether positive or negative
2. Negative attention should be used sparingly
3. Kids will choose negative attention over being ignored
4. If you yell at your kids, you are reinforcing their behavior
5. Ignoring + Positive Attention is your best power tool
6. Don't ignore good behavior; praise the positive, whatever it is and ignore the bad behavior!

My final workshop was with Jerusha Clark on the Secrets to the Marriage You've Always Wanted:

1. Change your mind, change your marriage (Proverbs 4:23)

• The only thing you can control is your mind

     2.  Speak life, not criticism or condemnation (Proberbs 18:21, 10:19)

     3.  Forgive (Colossians 3:23)

     4.  Reject iMarriage (don't be self-centered!)

     5.  Put First Things First!

I was feeling a little tired to stay for the closing program and was glad to get home.  I'm glad I didn't miss HAH this year, despite not feeling a hundred percent!